


i'm doing it all for you

by hyewon



Category: CLC (Band)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst, i wanted to write angst but I Failed, i wasn't made for this i'm a soft person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-06
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2019-06-22 17:11:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15586713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyewon/pseuds/hyewon
Summary: Yeeun didn’t love her back, and she probably never would.





	i'm doing it all for you

**Author's Note:**

> kyla and kane, my yesorn comrades, this quick mess is for you
> 
> title and verses from 'all for you' by years&years
> 
> // MINOR EDITS SORRY

_Kneeling at your temple, love was accidental_  

 _Singing bruises, I was foolish_  

 _Thinking I was careful, losing every battle_  

 _Singing bruises, I was foolish_  

 

* * *

 

 

Sorn slammed the front door without a care in the world as she frantically ran through the halls of their dorm, looking for their room. She had rushed out of the practice room as soon as she could after hearing the news, knowing exactly where and how she'd find Yeeun. 

 

Opening the door to their shared room (with Seunghee) in a rush, Sorn felt a piercing pain in her chest, as her vision settled on the bundle of blankets and pillows on Yeeun bed, the girl surely being right under them. She moved aside every cover, until she came face to face with a sight that broke her heart even more. 

 

Yeeun's eyes were read and puffy from all the crying, her tear stained cheeks glistening with the afternoon light coming from the poorly covered window. Her pout wasn't her usual playful, innocent pout, but a genuine expression of distress. Her short hair was a mess, and snot wouldn't stop coming out of her nose. 

 

(And despite all of it, Sorn still believed she was the most beautiful girl she had ever layed her eyes upon.) 

 

"Oh, baby" The Thai girl said softly, mostly to herself. She collected Yeeun up in her arms, kissing the top of her head longer than she should, before grabbing the blankets again and draping them around the two of them, instead of just the younger girl. Sitting on Yeeun’s bed, Sorn started rocking them back and forth softly, in what she hoped was a soothing gesture. 

 

"Unnie," Yeeun said, her voice cracking, and sounding so,  _so_  vulnerable, Sorn felt like crying herself. "Unnie." She repeated, this time letting the tears fall against Sorn's neck, as she grabbed on to her shirt for dear life with a clenched fist. 

 

“What happened, Yen? Talk to me,” Sorn already knew what had happened, of course, Elkie telling them all about it during their break. She was pretty upset about the whole thing (not as much as Yeeun though), feeling guilty, and she just wanted some advice. Sorn thought she could’ve gone to one or two of them, instead of just carelessly blurting it out to the whole group.

 

So yeah, now they all kind of knew what had went down. 

 

“She doesn’t like me, Unnie. She doesn’t- she doesn’t like me  _like that.”_ Sorn shut her eyes tightly, feeling a jolt of pain, not only because of the way Yeeun’s voice cracked, but also because of her words. She cared so much about the younger girl, just hearing her talk about someone else made her already vulnerable heart even more fragile. 

 

Yeeun didn’t love her back, and she probably never would. But Sorn already knew that, and as much as she hated it, she had come to some kind of weird piece with it. As long as Yeeun was happy and smiling, there was no reason why Sorn shouldn’t be happy, too. 

 

“Do you think it’s because of her drama? Because of that Myungha guy?” Yeeun suddenly asked, and despite herself, Sorn half smiled. 

 

“That’s his character, Yeeun.” She could practically feel the other girl roll her eyes against her neck. 

 

“Whatever. No one knows his name, anyway.” Sorn flinched. Yeeun wasn’t the type of person to say mean things just because. In fact, she wasn’t the type of person to say mean things  _at all_. “I’m sorry, that was uncalled for.”  _There she is_. Yeeun briefly pulled back, not breaking the hug, to lean her head back with her eyes closed. “I’m sorry I said that, Myungha’s actor.” 

 

Sorn smiled fondly at her. “I’m sure he forgives you. Who wouldn’t, when you are this cute?” She pinched her cheeks, not being able to restrain herself. 

 

“Stop that, Unnie” Yeeun tried to fight her off weakly, but Sorn claimed the little smile adorning her puffy face as a victory. However, it was soon replaced with a frown and a pout, urging Sorn to quickly put her arms around her again. 

 

“What’s wrong, baby tiger?” The nickname escaped her before she had any time to stop herself. She pressed her tongue against her cheek to prevent any more stupid words of coming out, but, luckily, Yeeun hadn’t seem to take notice of it. 

 

“I’m sorry I missed practice today, I probably made everything weird, and the girls must be really mad at me.” Yeeun sniffled a bit, and Sorn felt her heart break for the hundredth time that day. 

 

“There’s nothing to apologize for, Yen. And the girls aren’t mad, they’re just worried,” Sorn took a deep breath, not wanting to say what she had in mind, but knowing it was necessary. “You’ll have to talk to them eventually and tell them, you know that, right? And Elkie, too.” The younger girl groaned, probably to try and mask the sob begging to come out of her throat. “You can’t let this get between your friendship. You have to at least try, yeah? Can you promise me you’ll try, Yeeun?” 

 

A few moments passed in which the only thing audible in the room was Yeeun’s soft sniffles, and the busy traffic from outside. It wasn’t long before the younger girl was nodding to her words, though. 

 

“You’re right, Unnie. I have to try, for the fans, and for the group, and-” 

 

“No, Yeeun,” Sorn stopped her. “You have to do it for  _you_ , and for Elkie. It won’t be easy to heal, but you’ll be in better terms, if you do, okay? Forget about the fans, and the company. Hell, even forget about the rest of the group. Do this to heal yourself, in your own time.” 

 

Yeeun nodded once again. “Okay, Unnie, I promise. I don’t think I could forget about you, though.” Sorn’s chest fluttered as Yeeun shyly looked away. She wanted nothing more than to hold the girl close for the rest of the afternoon, tell her just how much she cherishes her, how much she means to her. Sorn didn’t know where she would be today if it weren’t for Yeeun being a constant presence by her side during the last three years.  

 

Before she could reply, though, Yeeun’s stomach growled, and Sorn let out a spontaneous laugh, while Yeeun blushed in embarrassment. 

 

“C’mon, baby tiger, I’ll try to cook something for you.” Sorn said, poking Yeeun’s tummy, eliciting a squeal and little laugh from the younger girl, their worries and afflictions momentarily forgotten. 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

“Was it hard?” 

 

Sorn frowned, looking up from the steaming pot of water, where she was ready to dunk some noodles (since that was pretty much all Sorn could do when it came to cooking, besides rice and tea), and giving Yeeun a questioning glance. 

 

She had texted Seungyeon earlier, telling her to take the rest of the girls for some ice cream or something similar, since they all had been down during practice, too, and some food would cheer them up. It also left Sorn and Yeeun on the dorm by themselves, which was something she felt Yeeun needed. 

 

“What was hard?” 

 

“When you broke up with Seunghee-Unnie.” 

 

 _Oh_. That. 

 

Sorn chuckled awkwardly. “At the time, yeah. I knew it was for the best, though, dragging our relationship when I just didn’t feel the same as before would’ve been unfair to her,”  _Just like_   _stringing her along when I finally realized I was starting to like_ you, Sorn thought. “It was difficult for the both of us, but we recovered with time. It took Seunghee-Unnie longer, of course, but she eventually got over it, and now, here we are.” 

 

Yeeun looked down at her barely touched cup of tea. Sorn could tell there was something in her mind, but she knew Yeeun had a hard time keeping things to herself (when it came to Sorn, at least). She patiently waited for her to speak, as she finally dunked the noodles into the pot, and searched the ingredients for a sauce Seunghee had tried to teach her ( _what did it have again? Oh, well, maybe Yeeun can settle with noodles and parmesan_) 

 

“Do you think you guys will ever get back together?” 

 

At the question, Sorn looked back at the younger girl, her wide eyes showing a tiny glint of hope. Hope that, if Sorn and Seunghee ever rekindled their old spark, maybe she still had a chance with Elkie, maybe all of those years pining after her wouldn’t have been for nothing. Her hope killed Sorn on the inside, and she had to swallow heavily to try and get rid of the sudden tightness she felt at her throat. 

 

She cast her line of vision back to the pot, knowing her words would only crush Yeeun’s wishful thinking. She couldn’t bare the sight of it, knowing that breaking Yeeun’s heart all over again would completely crumble hers, too. 

 

“I don’t think so, buddy.” 

 

“Oh.” The disappointment and sadness were evident, and Sorn had to take a deep breath to stop the tears from rolling down her face. 

 

How couldn’t she see? How was Yeeun so oblivious to Sorn’s true feelings? She wasn’t really hiding them, even if she wasn’t screaming them at the top of her lungs either. It hadn’t taken long for Seungyeon and Yujin to figure it out, and Seunghee had taken notice of it a few weeks after their break up, even if she had never mentioned it. Eunbin knew since who knows when, and wouldn’t stop teasing Sorn about it whenever Yeeun wasn’t in the room. The only people who didn’t know were Yeeun herself, and Elkie, who was just too precious to ever know when someone had a crush (hence why Yeeun confessing her feelings to Elkie had ended up disastrously). Sorn never shied away from Yeeun’s affection, she even accepted it and reciprocated it. All those years ago, she had listened and indulged Yeeun’s plan of taking off somewhere else, to live different lives, and she had secretly already started planning it. It was a surprise Sorn was saving when she managed to have all figured out, but at the rate things were going, Sorn wasn’t sure she’d be able to handle it. 

 

What if Yeeun had changed her mind? What if she didn’t want to run away with Sorn anymore? It was possible, people and their goals changed with time, and the thought of a life without Yeeun was something Sorn just couldn’t deal with. She would recover with time, for sure, but she didn’t  _want_  to. She wanted to have a little apartment in Thailand, or New York, or some city in Europe, with a wide view of the ocean, and Yeeun by her side, whether it was as a lover, or just a friend and life companion, Sorn didn’t care. She just wanted Yeeun by her side, knowing everything would be alright if she was. 

 

“Sorn-Unnie.” 

 

Sorn was startled from her thoughts, and she quickly wiped away the rogue tear that managed to escape her. “Yes?” 

 

“Earlier, back in the room, you called me- you called me 'baby tiger'.” Yeeun said quietly. Well, apparently she had noticed. 

 

Blushing, Sorn didn’t have the strength to look back at her. “I did, sorry. I won’t call you that anymore if you don’t like it.” 

 

“No! No, that’s not what I meant!” Yeeun hurriedly shook her hands, wide eyes filled with anxiousness and worry, as she tried to explain herself. “It’s just no one has ever called me that before and it took me by surprise! I do like it, Unnie, and you can keep calling me that if you want. I think it’s really cute and it can be, like, your secret nickname for me or something. Oh! And I can call you baby elephant! They can be like our secret code names!” The short haired girl quickly started ranting excitedly about the uses they could apply to their new 'code names'. While Sorn filtered the noodles and turned the hobs off, she smiled, her chest feeling warm and light as she listened to Yeeun. 

 

She would be alright, as long as they were together. 

 

Eventually, Yeeun stopped ranting and started eating the pasta Sorn had managed to make as best as she could. The short haired girl made sure to compliment her friend every time she took a bite, knowing how insecure Sorn was about cooking, and the thoughtfulness and care Yeeun had for her (and everyone and everything) endeared Sorn even more. This was the Yeeun she knew and loved, bubbly, cheerful, always positive, and always seeing the best in others. 

 

After a few minutes of silence from both girls -Yeeun eating quietly while Sorn drank her reheated tea-, Yeeun spoke again. “Thank you, Unnie. You always make me feel better.” 

 

Sorn smiled widely. “Of course, Yen, anything for you.” 

 

Yeeun put her plate aside, gently taking one of Sorn’s hands in her own and lacing their fingers together. “You know, before you arrived, I thought I wasn’t going to be able to get through this. It just hurt too much. It still does, but now that I feel a little better, I can see that it’s not unbearable, and that I’ll be okay. Especially if you are here with me, Sorn-Unnie. If we are together, I feel like there’s nothing we can’t do,” Yeeun gave her a bright smile, a sharp contrast to what she had been like an hour ago. “So, just stick with me, please?”

 

Sorn’s heart felt like it was going to explode, her lips stretching into a happy smile of her own. “There’s nothing else I would dream of doing, baby tiger.” 

 

Yeah, they would be alright. They were Yeeun and Sorn, after all, and there was nothing in this world they couldn’t face, as long as they had each other. Because there was nothing in this world Yeeun wouldn't do for Sorn, just like Sorn would do anything and everything for Yeeun.

**Author's Note:**

> constructive criticism and comments are always welcome! i'm @yyxyeeun at twitter for any other concerns you might have


End file.
